PRS Operatives have used proprietary technology to obtain a copy of a text message exchange between Debbie Wasserman Schultz, the Chairthing of the Democrat National Committee, and The One, hereinafter identified as “BHO.”

BHO: Just a note from Martha’s V’yard to let you know that you are doing a wonderful job.

DWS: OMFG (sorry about the “F” Mr. President – I’m so excited!), I am so honored, Mr. President. U are sooooo awesome!! I’ve been telling everyone about the eleventy-thousand jobs U’ve created and everything!

BHO: I know, and I hope U are also telling everyone about the seventy-eleventy-thousand jobs I’ve saved.

DWS: Oh, I have been telling everyone that too, Mr. President and also how you inherited all the really bad stuff from Bush’s failed policies. U are sooooo awesome! It’s not just me. Everyone in the country thinks you are awesome.

BHO: Well, I think there are a few people who might not agree with your assessment.

DWS: Maybe there are a few, but they R all racists, Mr. President. All the smart people know how awesome U R.

BHO: Well, thanks again, Debbie, for a job well done.

DWS: Mr. President…?

BHO: Yes?

DWS: U R so totally awesome. I would like to have a child with you.

BHO: Sorry, I don’t do Joos. You are, like, totally, haram.

DWS: I still think U’r awesome.

BHO: I knew you would.