Last night, one of our PRS Operatives caught up with Senator Ted Kennedy just as he was about to enter O’Hara’s Tavern. The following is a transcript of the interview:

PRS: “Senator Kennedy, I’m from PRS. Might you have a minute or two to answer a few questions?”

Kennedy: “PRS? Isn’t that some kind of female thing?”

PRS: “No Senator, that would be PMS. I’d like to ask you ….”

Kennedy: “Well hurry up about it. You’re cutting into my drinking time.”

PRS: “I will, sir. But, if you don’t mind my saying so, it appears that you may already have had a few.”

Kennedy: “BLOOD LEVELS, sonny boy!”

PRS: “Excuse me?”

Kennedy: “Blood levels. One has to keep the blood levels up. Obviously you don’t know shit about farkamology.”

PRS: “No, I suppose I don’t. But, I did want to ask you some questions about your questioning of Sam Alito.”

Kennedy: “Who?”

PRS: “Sam Alito. Judge Sam Alito.”

Kennedy: “Oh, the guy with the glasses – the Ginzo?”

PRS: “I certainly would not describe Judge Alito in that fashion.”

Kennedy: “Fine! What is it you want to ask me? I can feel my hands starting to shake here. My liver is barking.”

PRS: “Frankly, Senator, some of our readers were quite upset by your attempting to paint Judge Alito as a racist. I would like to know whether, in your heart, you really think that Judge Alito is a racist?”

Kennedy: “Personally, I don’t give a shit whether he is or isn’t. The only thing I know about the guy is that Bush nominated him and that’s enough reason for me to be against him.”

PRS: “In that case, Senator, don’t you think that making a charge as serious as racism is way over the top?”

Kennedy: “Listen Mr. PMS … PRS …whatever … I’m Ted goddamned Kennedy, and I can say whatever I want and do what I want in this town. Don’t screw around with me.”

PRS: “So, are you saying that you had no basis to make the charge, but you made it anyway, simply because you know you can get away with it?”

Kennedy: “You know what? I think that you’re the goddamned racist.”

PRS: “Pardon me?”

Kennedy: “You heard me. (shouting in the direction of two tall black men) “Hey Darrell, or Darnell, whatever it is, and your friend there, Whatshisname … Come here.”

Darnell: “What’s up?”

Kennedy: “This guy here is a goddamned racist. He just called you two guys ‘big dumb n**gers.’”

PRS: “He’s out of his mind. I never said that.”

Darnell: “Don’t worry. We work in the Senate Office Building, and we know him. He says stuff like this a lot, mostly when he is half ripped, which is most of the time..”

Darnell: (to Kennedy) “Hey Senator, maybe you should lighten up.”

Kennedy: “’Lighten up?’ Who the hell are you to talk to me like that? You obviously hate white people. You’re a goddamned, filthy racist!”

Darnell: “Senator, if I were you, I’d take a pass on O’Hara’s tonight and go directly home before someone not as nice as I am, or that fella is, shows up and hangs a beatin’ on your ass.”

PRS: “Thank you for your time, Senator.”