The Virtual Leash
This morning, while I was doing my morning walk, I saw a guy walking a little yip-yip dog on a leash. The dog remained about three paces behind the guy. I noticed that the leash came off the yip-yip dog’s neck and that the guy walking the dog didn’t notice. He kept on walking without ever looking back at the dog.

The dog remained the same three paces behind the guy while he was dragging the leash behind him with no dog attached to it. The yip-yip dog looked across the street at me, and I could damned near see a thought bubble over its head saying, “Yeah, I know. But, he’s really not that stupid most of the time.”

Pedicure and a What?
The Hair Salon in town that offers EyebroW Threading (I wrote about it here) has a new sign up. It announces that, with each EyebroW Threading, you get a pedicure “and filling”. Filling? Why would anyone’s feet need “filling”? Filling with what? Seems to me that when one gets a pedicure, the idea is to have things taken away from your feet (e.g. toenails, maybe calluses and other stuff too punky to mention). But, “filling”? WTF?

The Bridal Shop
The signage at the local bridal shop has provided me with blog fodder in the past, and I’m happy to report that, after a rather long period of seeing signage that made sense, today I was treated to the following:

Selling “bridalmaids”? Bridalmaids? Mothers and a Prom are on sale? I think I get the idea, but Sheesh. Press 1 for English.

Hair!
For some time now, I have been walking past a store that sells wigs. This conclusion was based on the white ceramic-appearing heads in the window, each of which sports a different “do”. Today, I was walking on the opposite side of the street and noticed the large sign over the store (How did I miss it before?), which reads:

Gadzooks! These people are trafficking in human hair! Farookin’ hair merchants!

Now that I think of it, I believe that, in the past, I have seen people from that store checking me out as I strutted my shit past the shop window.

A word to those hair-selling shits. Keep your greasy eyeballs off this magnificent mane! It is NOT for sale.