Ooohfah, That Smell!
At one of the many Christmas, holiday, almost winter, end-of-year parties I have recently attended, I had occasion to eat some white asparagus (It could just as well have been green). Because I also had been taking in copious amounts of vodka fluids, fifteen minutes after eating the asparagus I had occasion to visit the men’s room.
It only took that long for the asparagus to work its evil magic and cause the olfactory assault commonly known as “asparagus pee.†Oooofah!!!!
So I got to thinking a bit about asparagus pee and some of the facts and theories that surround this interesting, albeit most unpleasant phenomenon. It turns out that I am not the only one who thinks about this stuff. Indeed, I found a blog that contains, as part of its title “Asparagus Pee.†That blog contains a link to a site entitled, “The Skinny on Why Asparagus Makes Your Pee Stink,†which is an excellent summary of information on other sites.
The “Skinny†discusses a good deal of brain-numbing chemistry to identify exactly which compounds the body creates when it digests asparagus that cause this major stinkola. However, most interesting was the discussion of the genetics of the matter, because not everyone produces stinky pee after eating asparagus (estimates of the numbers of stinky pissers range from about 20% to 50%). It was, therefore, thought that certain people carry a gene that creates stinky pee. However, as the “Skinny†states:
Early investigators thought genetics had divided the world into stinkers and nonstinkers. That was until 1980, when three researchers had the presence of mind to wave pee from the nonstinkers under the noses of the stinkers.
Lo and behold, the problem proved to be one not of producing the stinky pee but of being able to sniff it out.
So, it may not be the case that some of us have been cursed with a stinky pee gene, while others have not. Rather, those who claim not to create asparagus pee might well carry a gene for a shitty sense of smell.
Being a man of science in a prior life and, therefore curious and empirical, I propose a simple experiment. I hereby invite one of you who claim to be able to eat asparagus and piss lilacs to join me for an asparagus dinner and a trip to the john about a half hour later. If I can smell yours, and you can’t smell mine, we will have answered this most important question without the benefit of a million dollar government grant.
And finally, for those of you who may consider yourselves to be asparagus pee connoisseurs (There’s no accounting for taste.), here’s a place where you can buy fashion items that permit you to share your passion with the world. (This link is also via the “Asparagus Pee” blog noted above.)
I know what you’re thinking. “Yo, Jimbo, with all this talk about disgusting stuff like stinky asparagus pee, can boogers be far behind?†– to which I reply, “hmmmm.â€
Update: I had forgotten to post the link to the site where one can buy Asparagus Pee tee-shirts. I have since corrected my omission. There are still seven shopping days before Christmas Holiday. Get right on it.
Jim. We have GOT to get you a hobby. A different one, I mean. 🙂
Comment by DMerriman — December 17, 2004 @ 9:28 pm
Um, yeah. In spite of the fact that you’re attending lots of parties, I think you need to . . . get OUT more . . .
Comment by Shamrock — December 17, 2004 @ 9:41 pm
See? This is the result of all that time hanging out in ladies’ restrooms.
Comment by zonker — December 17, 2004 @ 10:49 pm
Umm, I have never experienced this thing you call “asparagus pee”. And I have an extremely sensitive sense of smell.
Comment by Rita — December 18, 2004 @ 7:45 pm
Rita – Meet me at noon for an asparagus lunch, and be prepared to choose your stall. 🙂
Comment by Jim - Parkway Rest Stop — December 18, 2004 @ 7:51 pm
whaaattt???
I don’t believe that this guy ever recovered his senses after he head-butted a car door in the motel parking…
Trackback by Gut Rumbles — December 18, 2004 @ 7:51 pm
Well, thank gawd someone else experiences it besides me! I thought maybe I was completely nuts….rather than only half. I even asked a registered nutritionist once, and she looked at me like I had two heads. Said she’d never heard of stinky asparagus pee. Hhhmmp!
Comment by Pammy — December 18, 2004 @ 10:36 pm
Dammit Jim
Earlier tonight, I went to a Christmas party. They had asparagus. I love asparagus, but I couldn’t bring myself to eat any.
Trackback by Evilwhiteguy's Blog — December 19, 2004 @ 3:02 am
i never knew
After I poked fun at jimbo’s post about the unique aroma of aspargus pee, I did some research. Well, actually…
Trackback by Gut Rumbles — December 19, 2004 @ 9:49 am
Jim way to much info Merry Christmas
Comment by georgia — December 19, 2004 @ 11:43 am
quotes
I like the various quotes I culled from other bloggers about me and posted on my sidebar. Hey! I don’t…
Trackback by Gut Rumbles — December 19, 2004 @ 6:36 pm
Man, I thought I was the only one with that condition. Glad to know I’m not. Thanks… I think.
Comment by Dash — December 20, 2004 @ 10:53 am
Thanks for noticing! Your blog is interesting and well done, so I’ve created a nice reciprocal linkage thingy over on Asparagus Pee, Gooblek & Other Neat Stuff.
Comment by Chris Benson — December 22, 2004 @ 1:41 pm
Ahhh….at last life can go on. No more fretful nights…no more hiding…the shame can leave…I am not alone!
Comment by Louisa — January 20, 2005 @ 10:20 am
i ate asparagus today. my pee smelled, well, like asparagus. searching for websites committed to the terms ‘asparagus pee’ i was all too shocked/relieved to find so much information. i don’t know about sporting it on a yellow messenger bag though.
Comment by lisa — April 4, 2005 @ 4:53 pm
well… any other things that cause stinky pee? i actually did a google :]
Comment by hahaa — December 9, 2005 @ 5:14 pm