As a result of the hard work of some well-placed sources, I managed to get an interview with a genuine comment spammer. Here’s how it went:

Jimbo: “What is your name, sir?”

Spammy: “My name is Sammy, but people in the business call me ‘Spammy.’ Kinda catchy, no?”

Jimbo: “Frankly, no.”

Spammy: “No sense of humor? That’s your problem.”

Jimbo: “I’m really not interested in your attempts at humor. I am, however, interested in learning more about what goes on in the minds of spammers like you.”

Spammy: “Let’s be clear here. All spammers are not alike. Don’t lump me in with the e-mail spammers. I am a ‘comment spammer’ – a specialist.”

Jimbo: “Oh, I see. A specialist, are you? .How many bloggers’ comments do you figure that you spam in a given day.”

Spammy: “cheapsattlelitetv dot com Are you kidding? I can spam 100,000 comments with a single mouse click. And, I can fit lots of mouse clicks into one day, let me tell you. penisextension dot com”

Jimbo: “What the hell do you think you’re doing?”

Spammy: “cheap tickets dot com What do you mean, what do I think I’m doing? onlinepoker dot com”

Jimbo: “You son of a bitch. You’re spamming this conversation!”

Spammy: “texasholdem dot com Yeah, what of it? I never miss an opportunity. refinancenow dot com”

Jimbo: “Do you realize how many bloggers would like to cut your limbs off and feed them to you?”

Spammy: “freemovies dot com Sucks to be them, I guess. hotsex dot com”

Jimbo: “Do you have any idea how much I would like to cut your heart out and shove it up your ass?”

Spammy: “cheap Levitra dot com Well, then I guess it really sucks to be you, doesn’t it? lovematch dot com”

Jimbo: “Don’t push me, shitball.”

Spammy: “sisteraction dot com What are you going to do Chicky? Delete me? Bwahahahaha…….This interview is over. And, oh your comments are MINE! girlsongirls dot com“

Well, I tried.