1. I often see people write the word “Woot!” as a celebratory exclamation, but does anyone actually say “Woot!”?

2. If everyone were to buy one of those cutting-edge electric plug-in cars and then everyone were to plug them in, where would all the electricity come from if we close down the coal mines?

3. Twice on the way home from work, I encountered assholes who decided they wanted to stop the car and carry on a conversation with people standing on the sidewalk, and they didn’t much give a shit that they were blocking the farookin’ street. That’s when a rocket launcher would come in handy.

4. The best diet sodas are Diet Dr. Pepper and Coke Zero. By the way, in New Jersey, don’t call it “pop” or “tonic” or “coke” (unless you really want a Coke). “Pop,” sounds particularly silly to me.

5. Speaking of soda, it has been my experience that once one gets one-hundred miles from New Jersey or New York, it is exceedingly difficult, if not impossible, to find seltzer. No, I’m not talking about club soda. Seltzer is carbonated water, while club soda is carbonated water with sodium bicarbonate in it.

6. One appliance I’d have a tough time doing without is my Keurig single cup coffee maker (the Platinum Model). I buy the coffee online, sticking to the extra bold, gorilla stompin’ varieties.

7. I promised myself that this little bit of mental wandering would not deal with politics, but my difficult-to-manage rage with the douchebaggery of the current administration and with the federal government in general has broken through and screwed up this meaningful interlude with youse peeps. I shall stop writing now.