Today I find myself harboring yet another serious case of the ass. I probably spent too much time watching the news and reading about, as we used to say in school, “current events.”

I watched Chuck Schumer go on and on about how swell the government option socialized medicine will be. Of course, you’ll never run into that weasel-faced prick in the government clinic.

I watched the video of the young animals in Chicago beat a kid to death. (I’m not linking it. It’s easy enough to find, and it’s difficult to watch.) It was positively sickening. I hope they are all caught and are treated like the animals they are. Pieces of shit.

Tomorrow, the Empire State Building will be lit up in red and yellow in honor of the sixtieth anniversary of the communist revolution in China. Yeah, I know; the building is lit up differently for various occasions, but Jesus H. Christ! The anniversary of the communist revolution? The country has gone insane.

Oprah is going with The One and Mrs. The One to Denmark to lobby for holding the Olympics in Chicago. We can’t lose with a powerhouse team like that on the case. Maybe Oprah can give everygoddamnedbody in Denmark a car. Maybe street beatings will be a new event for the Olympics. Chicago has a team ready to go.

I could go on and on, but all I’m doing is pissing myself off even more.

That is all.